Tuesday, 16 September 2008

Stimulating the G-spot

Stimulating the G-spot

The G-spot could be compared to a sort of Holy Grail of sexual pleasure for women, while the men who look for it are knights errant trying to obtain the highest sexual satisfaction possible for their ladies.
Many couples have spent hours trying to find the magic pleasure spot, mostly because there is something inherently alluring about mastering a way of boosting pleasure beyond the regular orgasm.
And we all know that once you’ve found the hot spot, the gates of pleasure are wide open.
Any person who’s tried to stimulate the G- spot knows that it is located on the vagina wall, toward the pelvic bone and that in order to reach it one must insert a finger and then bend it upwards.
This is by far the easiest way to find the G-spot and to stimulate it. Once you’re there, you can either move the finger as though you’re scratching something (don’t use your nails, though) or in little circles in order to cover a wider area. Come to think of it, better use two fingers on the G-spot, to get the most pleasure out of the whole thing.
While you’re at it, you can also use a finger or your tongue on the clitoris or, if you’re feeling in a perky mood, put a finger up her anus.
There is not a lot of room for imagination and improvement when it comes to playing with the G-spot. The man can use his fingers, some sex toys or his penis, while the woman can stimulate herself using her fingers or toys. Of course, the sex toys must be appropriate for this activity, which means that you need a dildo or vibrator with a hooked or bent tip that makes it easier to reach the G-spot. Don’t move the toy around too much and don’t try to make circles with the tip.
Toys are harder to use than fingers, so try to move the tip back and forward over the spot, while adding a little pressure. Your partner will certainly let you know if what you do feels good or not.
The playful lover knows that he can also reach the G-spot with his penis, although the thing is a bit trickier than just moving a finger around. You and your lady must try a couple of different positions in order to find those that allow you to give the G-spot a good rubbing.
Doggy style comes to mind, because the penis can rub against that sensitive patch of flesh both when going in and when pulling out. Of course, the positions featuring the woman on top are also very good because the lady can adjust the angle of insertion to make sure that the penis takes the correct route.
So there you have them, the three options for the bold lovers who are not content with regular sex, but are interested in discovering new ways of pleasing each other. And there’s probably no better way of pleasing a woman that full stimulation of both the G-spot and the clitoris at the same time. Men should not be ashamed to ask the ladies to help them locate the G-spot, especially since the ladies will certainly be eager to help. After all, it’s in their best interest.



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How do I talk to my partner about anal sex?

How do I talk to my partner about anal sex?

The easy answer is the tried and true solution: communication is the key to having anal sex. You need to make your partner understand that you like the idea of having anal sex, that you would like to put it into practice and that you wouldn’t do anything that may hurt her.
Achieving the right approach is very important because it might just make the difference between a “Why not?” answer and the “You sick bastard!” answer. Think about which of these two answers you’d like to hear from your lady and act accordingly.

One of the best ways of educating yourselves on anal sex is to buy one or two books and read them together with your partner. Of course, you need to bring up the issue before buying books, because it would look a bit strange if you suddenly whipped one out. Maybe mention it during a conversation on fantasies and ways to improve your sex life.
Make her a trade: anal sex for whatever fantasy she wants to try. New territory is always exciting, especially in sex, and you might have a big surprise learning that she’s not all that opposed to anal sex. Still, it’s all in how you bring it up.
Whether you have some previous experience with anal sex or not, one thing is clear: when the words “anal sex” are spoken you and her will think of very different things. Chances are you’ll think “Nice and tight!!!”, while she will focus on “Dirty AND Painful!”. This difference in looking at the issue will extend down to every detail. You are probably going to worry about condoms and lubrication and she will wonder whether anal sex will cause hemorrhoids or anal fissures.
What you should do is to try and understand all her worries and to find the proper solutions to her problems.
So educate yourself about anal sex and use a relaxed, yet eager attitude. If she says no, accept the answer and try again later. If she says yes, don’t start hollering and jumping around the room. Be cool and try to identify her fears and worries; just because she said yes, it doesn’t mean that she is 100 percent cool about it. She’s probably thinking “Well, it can’t be that bad” and you need to work hard to get her to the proper “Hey, this sounds fun!” attitude.
And another very important thing is to refrain from appearing too anxious to do it. You need to help her build confidence and that’s not going to happen if you’re being pushy about the subject. She will only think that you are insensitive or, worse, untrustworthy. Since anal sex gives full control to the man, the lady depends on you and has to be very confident that you would not do anything to hurt her.
A pushy man that wants to rush things is not likely to make a woman trust him because he looks like he might do anything and not even apologize later.




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What is Kama Sutra?

What is Kama Sutra?

Of all the treasures of learning that Europeans have acquired from the Far East, Kama Sutra is perhaps the best known, along with Yoga and Buddhism.
Starting with the industrial revolution of the late 18th century and the advent of fashionable foreign traveling, Europe and Northern America have been flooded with art objects, ideas, values and philosophy from the Far East that changed, to a certain extent, our way of thinking.
Busy Westerners obsessed by tomorrow are intrigued and fascinated by the attitudes of people who are content to live this day and who are not afraid of the future.
When mentioning Kama Sutra, most people think of it as an exotic help book on sexual satisfaction or just an ancient porn magazine. The complete name of the book is actually “Vatsyayana’s Aphorisms on Love” (“Vatsyayana Kamasutram”) and it’s a treaty made of 36 chapters.
The aim of this collection of aphorisms is to provide a comprehensive guide to sex, relationships with courtesans, courtship of married women, marriage and, finally, improving one’s chances to have good sex through the use of herbs, substances, spells and sex toys. As you can see, the purpose of this book was to become a definitive guide to what love and sex meant to the Indian society around the 4th century AD.
Aside from sex and love, the “Aphorisms on Love” is a very orthodox book, after the fashion of the society that spawned it. Its purpose is to teach the lover what to do to get the woman he desires while still protecting both his and hers good names and reputations. Reputation was extremely important all over the ancient world, not just in India, and the person who forfeited it for such an insignificant thing as sex was considered to be frivolous, not worthy of the esteem of others. Vatsyayana himself, a celibate scholar, believed that sex was not bad in itself, but that engaging in it was certainly frivolous and sinful.
The 36 chapters are each written by an expert of the issue and cover a wide range of issues, such as observations on the daily life of a citizen, sex positions, personal adornment, how to kiss, gaining the confidence of women and the means by which courtesans get money. The best known part of the book, the study of sex and sexual positions, makes up only about 20 percent of the whole text. Nevertheless, those who are truly interested in sex should read the entire book. After numerous centuries the ancient theory is still surprisingly accurate because people still want the same basic things from one another.
Although this may sound very unlikely, at the bottom Kama Sutra is somewhat akin to Machiavelli’s “The Prince”, although the Indian book on love is much more careful to observe the morals of the time. Both books are guides to some of the aspects of their respective societies and both deal with them in a frank and realistic manner. Vatsyayana is not fooling himself that men and women are naturally virtuous creatures and so was perfectly willing to give advice on how to seduce married women, just as Machiavelli knew that a prince is bound to do evil things from time to time.






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What are the benefits of Tantric sex?

What are the benefits of Tantric sex?

Tantric sex is not just regular sex. The average “in-out-have a nice day” kind of sex is seen by those who practice Tantric sex as simply wasting energy on something that could be much more than that.
Therefore, one could say that Tantric sex means taking sex to a new dimension and using it to improve the link between body and spirit and to extend the rejuvenating power of orgasm to the whole body. After all, why shouldn’t we profit from something that is in our power to do, especially since it does not take much to acquire this skill?
One of the goals of Tantric sex is to stimulate the endocrine glands to produce more hGH, serotonin, DHEA and testosterone.
These hormones help improve sexual health, promote the flow of blood through the body, take out the trash (toxins, that is) and strengthen the nervous and immune systems in order to increase the overall health.
A person who’s into Tantric sex feels healthy and rejuvenated without the use of substances or devices. Sex is quite enough to bring about these changes in a person. However, one must know how to engage in sex and what to do in bed in order to achieve this healthy state.

Practitioners of Tantric sex claim that it has a rejuvenating effect on men and women, improving sexual health and altering the body’s chemistry by means of brain waves. Frequent and powerful orgasms are a sure way of changing somebody’s mood and of relieving anxiety and depression.
All the maladies plaguing the modern mind (such as stress, depression and lack of confidence) can be cured by having sex more often and by experiencing better and more orgasms.
And along with these problems of the mind, one could easily get rid of other problems.
Women are interested in Tantric sex because the stressful lifestyles of today take their toll on sexual health.
Tired and stressed people are in no mood for sex and, thus, have a bleak view of life and suffer from more conditions than happy people. Although we cannot know for sure, there is a fair chance that many frigid or unhappy women could live far more satisfying lives if their lovers really knew how to take care of them.
One of the targets of Tantric sex is to take this unhappiness and turn it into a positive mindset using the body’s own resources.
Men, on the other hand, can have a lot of fun with Tantric sex, especially since it also focuses on improving erection and ejaculation, the two pillars of sex for men.
Sexual satisfaction also results in a huge boost to self confidence, which is very likely to trigger a reinforcing psychological pattern of successful performance and increased confidence.
A man who can give himself and his partner a couple of strong orgasms on a regular basis is a happy and healthy man. Not to mention that his partner is also bound to enjoy a positive view on life and a general feeling of healthy living.





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Bedroom Issues: Am I terrible in bed?

Bedroom Issues: Am I terrible in bed?

Frankly, if you need to ask this question then you already have a big problem. Whether you’re actually bad in bed or just low on confidence, I can’t say. This is up to you to find out, while I’m just doing some explaining for your convenience.

The root of the problem lies in the very simple fact that it takes a lot of experience to know if a woman has an orgasm or if she’s faking it. And even experienced men can’t always tell if the woman’s faking it or not. Bottom line: you can never be sure that your performance is top quality.
And that’s even before we take into account slip ups and “that time” when you were too tired or too stressed or you had too much to drink and, well, you know what happened. Unfortunately, these things can erode a man’s peace of mind and confidence and make him suspicious of his lady’s behavior, even if he shouldn’t be. Some times are good and some times are bad and there’s little you can do about it.
Loosing confidence in yourself and throwing good self-esteem out the window just because of a slip up is not the way to deal with this.
There are many things that could go wrong, which are not necessarily under your control.
We do live in a stressful world and the modern fashion that surrounds a man with dozens of machines in order to allow him to work harder and harder everyday is doing it’s best to ruin sex around the world.
I’m sure that many men who have to resort to Viagra would do better to try and relax a little and take things easier. Stress is one of the great “sex killers” nowadays because no man can truly enjoy himself if he keeps thinking about deadlines, bosses, nasty co-workers or credit card debt.

Aside from its direct impact on performance, stress has some side effects that are just as bad. Some men take to drinking because of it. It always starts small since going out with the guys is fun and hey, we’re just having a few beers. Before you know it the number of beers grows and the “evenings out” turn into “nights out”. Small wonder that a stressed man with a significant quantity of alcohol in his body is not performing in bed as usual.
Men need to recognize the early signs of stress in their lives and take control of the situation.
Remember that once you’ve started asking questions about your performance you could easily slide into a pattern where low self esteem triggers a failure, which, in turn, sends self esteem even lower and so on.
Try to be a bit more positive about things. You were probably tired or stressed. Or you may need to learn some new positions and break the bedroom routine a bit. Surprise her with a new trick or a fantasy.





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